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Category Archives: parenting

Via feministe: The arguement for paying moms less

The fact that mothers are under scrutiny for how much time they ‘waste’ while at work (taking phone calls from kids and having to pick them up on snow days etc) is itself sexist. Why don’t we ask how it is men can be productive, considering how constantly distracted they are by sex? Why don’t we ask how it is smokers can be productive? I repeat: the focus on women parents is sexist – and I’m not even tackling the inherent hypocrisy in pretending that we as a society care about families, while offering to pay those who do the family work less than others, thereby making it necessary for them to work even longer hours to make the money needed to cover the costs of working etc.

Only women are under this kind of scrutiny: how they dress, how much they weigh (overweight women make less money), how assertive they are or aren’t, how they choose lower paid jobs naturally (without consideration to why the jobs women choose pay less or what influences job choices), if they have children can they be as productive as those without children, if they don’t have children they are going to take maternity leave. Only women face these stereotypes; only women are always found wanting, found to be the makers of the sexism that prevents their success.

Yet, there are literally thousands of ways to ‘waste‘ time at work. Read More »

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I told this story to someone at school today. We moved into a new house a few months back. Before we moved things in, we took the girls through. Little F, just three years old, was excited. This house is a bit newer than the 100+ year old row house were were renting. One architectural detail amused her, however. In the upstairs bedroom, she encountered, for the first time, a closet. She walked into the closet, turned a full circle and looked up at me, with her brows furrowed in confusion (Elise has a particularly expressive face). She said “What’s this for mama?”

Here’s a comment I wrote on a feministing post about a woman who had a baby at 15 and dares to be proud of it at 22. Too many people, even in the feministing community, feel that having children is a right we should bestow only on monied people of the right age demographic: http://www.feministing.com/archives/014718.html#comments

She’s getting the attention because she’s smart and savvy. Had she done any other adult-like thing successfully at 15 that framed her life as she continued into college and gone on to talk about it in a campus newspaper, she would have been lauded in this forum…

But having a baby is different, it seems. And talking back to efforts to frame her as cheap are different it seems. Because she had a baby before our culture thinks she is ready to have a baby (forget whether she thinks she is ready… and hell, many people aren’t ready to have babies at 30, or 40, but we do, because that is what we do…) Also the crux is that teenage mothers = poverty.

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